The First Generation
“While we as students can only imagine our future, our teachers, who bridge cultures with us, offer valuable insights into how we might approach raising a family, drawing on their own experience as they raise children now.”
People who don’t know the Bronx often think of it as poor, undeveloped, and failed, perhaps because it's a haven for immigrants and diverse communities. But the Bronx gives immigrants the chance to pursue their dreams and have a taste of the American dream. Our school Comp Sci High, reflects that the negative perception of the Bronx is just a bitter lie. Founded by the innovative first generation Americans David Noah and Iris Alder, Comp Sci High was built with a vision of a computer science high school in the Bronx for emerging leaders.
Through their leadership, the school has fostered a dynamic culture, attracting many first-generation American students who are empowered to define their own vision of excellence. At Comp Sci High, we see how diverse cultural backgrounds influence parenting styles and discipline, shaping the identities of students both as individuals and learners. With this foundation offered by foreign-born parents, the question arises: how will first-generation Americans raise their own children?
In this article, we spotlight the voices of our teachers and staff, many of whom are also first generation Americans. They have navigated the complexities of cultural differences and know firsthand the influence of foreign-born parents. Through their unique experiences as educators and parents, they provide valuable insights on how cultural identity impacts not only their careers, but also their approach to raising their children.
As students, we are encouraged to listen to their journeys and reflections. These teachers offer us a glimpse of both the present and future, showing us how they bridge cultural values and adapt to new ones as they guide us towards adulthood. In exploring their stories, we can better understand what it might mean for us as future parents. While we as students can only imagine our future, our teachers, who bridge cultures with us, offer valuable insights into how we might approach raising a family, drawing on their own experience as they raise children now.
Ms. Lawrence grew up in a Jamaican household, where her parents prioritized hard work and academic achievement. They viewed her as their little star in the making, and Ms Lawrence would feel for her mom as she was working hard to prepare delicious dinner for the family, and wanted to help her mother out, but her mother would refuse the offer of help, and would tell Ms. Lawrence: “It’s fine, go focus on your studies, I’ll be fine.” Her parents’ expectations for her were that she go to college, get a masters, and have a career, not just a regular nine to five hourly job at a franchise. This expectation shaped how she viewed school; she felt and knew it was a way to make her parents proud; school became her first job and she knew that she had to collect those A’s like Pokemon cards.
Ms. Lawrence believed her parents were protecting her bright self from the threats of the world. She remembered her mom vividly telling her: “I want you to marry a man that doesn't have to use his physical body to make money in order to provide for your family.” That was her parent’s discipline. Ms. Lawrence would miss out on sleepovers, as she saw all her friends go to them. Soon, her friends stopped asking because they knew what the response was going to be: “My parents aren't going to let me go.” As her parents migrated from Jamaica to America, they had higher expectations for everyone.
Her parents influenced her own expectations in the things that they wanted; they made clear what would make them proud or what wouldn't make them proud. Ms. Lawrence highlighted that her parents gave her everything. She was always fed, and always had a roof over her head, and it was simple to give success back to her parents in return. She knew the sacrifices they made all for the perfect life she had.
What Ms Lawrence acquired from her parents, as she is now a mother to her son Kash, is how serious she takes learning. What she brings to the table that is different from her parents is that she doesn’t want her son to just to do anything to make her proud, and she doesn’t want her son to be a “people-pleaser,’ a term that she was often called out for. People viewed her as a people pleaser because her parents would remind her that she had to make them proud. She would always seek validation from others to prove she was supposed to be doing what she was doing, and if it wasn't for validation, she didn't do it. She wants her son Kash to do what he wants to do for himself. A way she practices this is by teaching him that learning is his idea, so Kash is heavily interested in Blippi right now, so Ms Lawrence makes him sound out the letters of the show in order to watch it.
Mr. Mosley grew up in a Liberian household, where his parents prioritized the traditional success of an African. The traditional model of success defined by an African is that you have to be a doctor, lawyer, or engineer. These three professions and careers are all tied to big money, which can grant you success and pride. Mosley's parents' expectation of him were to monitor the cleanliness of his home, and bring back home A’s and B’s. Him bringing back these spectacular grades wasn't a big deal to his parents because they knew his potential.
Although Mosley may have known he had the “sauce” and drive in elementary-middle school, he lost that drive in college when he realized no one was watching him. Mosley had to discover and explore his own drive, not his parents’ drive, and this was a significant point during his lifetime, as the opportunity for him to attend college at a prestigious school, Columbia, was granted to him with a scholarship.
Mosley’s described his parents as strict. He mentioned that his Liberian mother was very strict. “Even if there was one spoon in the sink,” Mosley said, “She’d be like you didn’t do this properly.” However Mosley's father, who was born in the US, made him accustomed to the US values and norms, and was less strict than his mom. He described his father’s parenting style as having fun but knowing where to draw the line. Mosley’s father made him excited to become a father, so that he could pass down the love that his father gave to him. He’s happy to realize that he accomplished that goal.
Mosley highlighted that the relationship that him and his mother had wasn’t were he wanted it to be when he was younger, merely because his mother was somewhat cold and unaffectionate towards his accomplishments during his upbringing. Mosley did mention her coldness as a generational thing, and he said that his mother’s mom was the same way as well.
However, Mosley breaks the curse of the cold generational parent, as he affirms his daughter that she’s that girl and whatever she does he will be there for her. He did see his mothers attitude somewhat seep its way into his emotions, and he says he’s trying to get better at caring about the little things in his daughter’s life.
Mosley praises his parents for the wonders they did for him. “They held it down,” he said.
A special shoutout should be going out to foreign-born parents. They came to the country with the intent of hope. But they made their “limited” unlimited for their kids, and when we see the students of CSH strutting through the halls because they take pride in their look, we see how that limited has became unlimited. We see from Ms. Lawrence and Mr. Mosley that they feel and know they owe it to their parents.
So if we are wondering how first-generation Americans influence their children, the only direction that they are steering towards is EXCELLENCE!